Blog, Metaphysical, New Beginnings, Thoughts, Travel, Uncategorized

Bali Day 5

Sun Rise

Today I woke up at 5am, seems to be a theme for me here. I stepped out onto the front triangle deck and pulled out the thai mat, meditated and did sun salutations as the sun rose. In the valley of the waterfall, which is beneath me, I can hear the sounds of a man singing somewhere along the valley lines. It was quite beautiful and tranquil.

Today was my day to just sit in peace and do me. I had no desire to go anywhere, as my legs are ridiculously sore from trek the previous day. Side note; I woke up at 2am and had to use the restroom which is downstairs. I cannot tell you how painful that was! So I took a shower and had some delicious breakfast and relaxed.

I opened all the doors and windows in my treehouse and let the air flow through. When the sun came out I would go and sit out there and bask in it. I spent most of my day going through all of my pictures from the waterfalls. It was so wonderful.

Lunch time came around and my new friend, Vipin, and I were to go have lunch; But then the rain came and it poured buckets…much like it is at this moment. And I ran downstairs and played in it…It was magical!

The rain finally came to a halt and we were set free. Vipin and I went to lunch at the koi pond. It was so pretty and green. The fish were happily fed as was Vipin and I. We hung out there for a bit and meandered back to the houses.

Vipin wanted to show me the other cottage in the rice fields so off we went on the motor bike. I enjoyed the ride, we are in a small village so there isn’t traffic everywhere like in Ubud. We drove country side and came to the property. It was quite amazing, staying in this little villa. The view was astounding. It was placed on the bottom of the fields, so all you see is rice fields- going up.

When we left we took a cruise through the rest of the village and came back. Where I picked up where I left off, on my computer. Just as dinner was being served, Vipin comes to me with a message talking about cancellations and such. So I start doing my research as I am eating. I am to go to Cambodia for 2 weeks on the 20th.

I find all my flight info and found that Cambodia closed it’s doors to tourists. So now I am in a panic, trying to figure out how to cancel my flight and get a refund; and then I realized I did not get a VOA when I arrived because I was going to Cambodia. VOA is visa on arrival. Which is if you want to stay past 30 days. Which now I will be. hahaha…nervous laughter at that time.

Have a Beautiful Day

I start calling my mom and emailing my dad and contacting the airline. Then I stopped.

I said to myself, “Self, what are you doing, this is why we didn’t plan anything. It’s all about the adventure, the journey, the excitement of what is going to happen next. Everything happens for a reason and it is ALWAYS for your greatest and highest good. You might not be able to see it but it’s a fact. You already trust the process, and this is no different.”

So with having that little chat with myself I was able to get some rest, with ease and grace.

Blog, Metaphysical, New Beginnings, Thoughts, Uncategorized

Cactus Ceremony

After some time of not having internet access, I am back. This past Wednesday I participated in a Cactus Ceremony.

The intention for Cactus Ceremony is to open your heart space and allow healing. You are asked to come with your personal intentions on what you would like to heal.

For me, my intention was to heal everything that hasn’t been cleared (energetically) from my past up unto this point. So that I may move forward free and clear, open and ready to receive.

In my life at this time, I was preparing to leave Central California and go back East to see my mom and my step dad (Whom I’ve only started talking to in the past year, after 2 years of not speaking). I have healed all of my childhood wounds that came forward, however there are a several things that have been brought to my attention and in my recent past that needed healing. My intention was to clear that. And I did.

It was a 4 part ceremony. We meditated and spoke of our personal lives and pulled oracle and tarot cards. Every card pulled was on point, more of a confirmation than anything.

 

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Our Alter

 

As it turns out this entire ceremony was based on us trusting, valuing, having confidence, and understanding ourselves. Every card pulled had the word trust in it. We had set an alter and I had placed my shungite Merkabah on the alter and on top of it I placed a little stone with the word trust on it. Not knowing that the entire ceremony would be based on that word alone. Shungite is a beautiful crystal that assists in purification, most importantly for me, emotional balance. I was leaving a place I had come to know and appreciate with amazing people and I was heading to a place where I was not accepted as I child. I am a woman now and I really don’t have many fears, if at all. But nonetheless I was about to embark on a journey of the unknown. Unknowing of the outcome, so this particular crystal found me and I use it daily.

Part of the trusting, is listening to yourself. When something doesn’t sit right with you, why? what is the feeling? The sooner I can recognize the sooner I can adjust it and work on it and it will dissipate. Awareness is the key factor. If you are not aware then there is no way you can trust yourself. Because trusting yourself is listening to yourself. It really is a beautiful thing.

The last segment of the ceremony is, how can I assist the Cactus medicine in it’s healing. I thought about it for a minute and then it just came out, I am going to create a sacred space for myself wherever I go.

If you are in spiritual awareness you KNOW that you are sacred.

Well, after I said that I started thinking that I can use physical items to help me create these sacred spaces. Then, as if lightening struck, I said no I AM SACRED.

I, at that exact moment, UNDERSTOOD that I am sacred. I can say I know forever but do you really understand? I most certainly do. I now totally understand that I am sacred and I am sacred space.

When we were closing ceremony, my friend was taking us through the closing prayer and the minute she said letting go the candle burnt out. It truly was magical. So many synchronistic things were happening all night and the messages were all so loud and clear. It was beautiful.

After we closed ceremony my friend decided she was going to take a shot. I have not had a drink in 10 years. I quit drinking because my best friend said I had a problem and if I didn’t stop I would die. Then she told me she didn’t think I could do it. So I had to prove her wrong. So I stopped and did the whole AA thing.

I drank because I was running away from my problems. I couldn’t handle them without being drunk. I have gone through so much healing that I no longer have anything that I run from.

So when my friend decided to have a drink, I thought about it. I couldn’t even finish my thought before my spirit guides said it’s ok, you can have a drink. It’s about trust, right? I am so used to being put into a category of Alcoholics that society will judge me if I take a drink. That is my human side if thinking, logical, practical, old ideas and beliefs. I have learned throughout the past couple of years that I does not matter what anyone thinks of you and you just do you. Do what makes you happy and makes your heart sing.

So now the crossroads have become, do I not take a drink because society says I can’t? Or do I take a drink because I trust that I am a completely new within myself?

I am doing me and I listen to myself today! I poured 1/2 a shot of Jameson Whiskey. Every time my friend took a shot I would take a sip of my shot. It was so smooth and so nice. I thoroughly enjoyed myself. After all we were celebrating ourselves and everything that is coming. The new Us. I was truly liberating.

I was able to take a drink because I am not running from emotions or trying to hide and not confront emotions. I can have just one drink if I so choose. I am not the scared little girl anymore, I have grown into a beautiful, soulful woman. I love my life.

 

Blog, Metaphysical, Thoughts

Practice becomes Second Nature

You ever feel like you have just talked to someone and you feel how they are feeling? That is part of being an empath.

“An Empath┬áis a person who can psychically tune in to the emotional experience of a person, place or animal.”

http://www.empathguide.com/

My dad and I are extremely close, we have lived many lives together and we live on a parallel timeline in this life. Since my suicide attempt and my spiritual growth has sky rocketed since, I have been practicing grounding before I talk to him. Due to the fact that he is Italian and has lots of emotions and happens to be growing through a lot of things.

As of late, things in my world and my dads have been changing, the difference is I understand how to clear, cleanse and ground. My dad is working towards that but he doesn’t know how to clear his mind.

I have been noticing that I have not been clearing, cleansing or grounding before I talk to my dad even over the phone. This is a huge lesson for me because I have been getting wrapped up in his whirlwind. After our chats I have been having to clear, cleanse and ground myself. However it would be way more beneficial to do that before I get on the phone or see him.

So I my mission is to practice clearing, cleansing and grounding on a dime. Quick and simple.

How I normally do it, is close my eyes, breathe out my heart space and drop roots into mother earths heart center. That simple. There’s no reason I can’t do that on a drop of a dime.

As I like to say, “Handle it!”

Just practice and soon it will become second nature. Just like everything we do…

Love, Light and Healing xoxo