Blog, Metaphysical, New Beginnings, Thoughts, Travel, Uncategorized

Still learning lessons

Being here in Bali has shown me that I need to just do me at all costs. Since the beginning of this amazing adventure I was at the mercy of my own intuition…going on my first solo trip out of country and then this covid thing happened.

As I met new people and began hearing everyone’s concerns and situations I started getting wrapped up in their emotions and decisions.

I had taken a step back and realized that they weren’t mine to take on and so I left the emotions behind and continued on with my intuition.

Around this time August 11th, there has been a wide spread panic about everyone’s visa situation. The Indonesian government announced that everyone here in a free visa/ visa exempt needed to leave by August 10th. That was July 14th. Over the course of those weeks, more people stresses over the visas than anything else. Flights are still being cancelled and so many people have no way of leaving. And if they are like me, we don’t want to leave at all, especially to America at this time.

The last week of July the Indonesian government made a second announcement saying that the deadline has been pushed to August 20. All other visa holders just need to extend their visas with no problems.

I came here on the free visa/ visa exempt so I needed to figure out how to get on the social visa before it was too late. Everyone I spoke to had so many different ideas. I have no clue what I am doing and all I could do was listen to everyone.

Going through an agency is super challenging because who can you really trust. The prices were so high. It’s not cheap to go through an agency but I really needed assistance going through the process. I was going to wait for more information and nothing came. My friends kept saying they are gonna wait…and we were all gonna do it together.

Yesterday was the last day for free visa holders to handle their shenanigans. I finally stepped out of everyones energy surrounding the visa crisis and went last Friday and handled it. I went yesterday to pay for it. Most of my friends didn’t do anything. I was worried about them u til I realized that it’s not mine and let it go.

If they are meant to stay then Bali will keep them, but when Bali is ready for you to move on you will know it. That’s a fact!

So with that being said I am learning my lessons with ease and grace. My lessons in the past have been aggressive and abrasive. Some things you would think I would have learned them already but when it creeps in like this clearly I have not. But I feel that these things were just reminders for me to stay in me and continue to listen to my needs.

I am so blessed to be in this position and the ability to see clearly. Forever grateful to Bali, the island of gods, for accepting me and welcoming me with open arms…

Blog, Metaphysical, New Beginnings, Thoughts, Uncategorized

Intuition

I woke up in time to go to either yoga class, but deep down I couldn’t figure out which one I felt like going to. I really wanted to run my errands and I had to work at 4pm. So being that I just woke up and couldn’t make any decisions for myself first thing, I went to my pendulum to ask which class I am going to.

My Pendulums

I wake it up and ask, it proceeds to tell me that I am not going to either. I ask are you just being intuitive, and the reply was yes. So I decided to run my errands. I get up shower and go.

As I drive to my first destination, I enjoy the music playing in my car and the sun that is shining bright through my sunroof. I feel as though I’m living heaven on earth. So peaceful and at ease.

I pull in and park my car and realize that I will still have time to get to the next yoga class when I am done. I get out of my car and smell some weird rubber burning smell. I look around and notice they are doing construction. But it didn’t seem as if it was that. I walk around to the other side of my car and didn’t smell anything. I retrace my steps to the drivers side again and stuck my nose in the tires to see if it was my car. Sure enough, it was my rear tire. I decided to go in and get what I needed and then come back and regroup.

When I came back outside I googled burning rubber smell in tire. It came up with all these things that were not something a new car owner would want to hear. So I immediately called the dealership and told them I don’t feel comfortable driving around in my car with whatever may be happening. Greg, was on the rcvg end and graciously got me within 15 mins.

As I sat on the bench outside of the dealership I began to realize that my pendulum knew. And as I pondered the intuitive aspect of myself and the pendulum, I see my first butterfly of the season. Blessed to witness nature and all of it’s creations.

Greg came out with the mechanic and told me that it was a slide that bound. So they loosened it up in the brake. Great, done. I go in to grab my keys and get the paperwork done and this little lady comes racing up to me…

“OMG, you bought my car!!! You know the color of that car is called sandy beach?”

I was slightly confused for a minute and then when she said that about the color I realized this is the previous owner, and how cool because I live on the beach. She begins to tell me how she named her car “GIGI” short for Great Granma. my jaw just about fell out of my skin, I named her Golden Goddess and my dad calls her GIGI for short.

I must mention what this lovely lady looked like. She’s a granma, wearing flip flops and yoga capri pants. She had a tank top on and a hot pink long cardigan and her hair was white, and dyed it purple.

I thought to myself, of course you were the previous owner…I am so grateful that it was this lovely funky woman. She was the sole owner until I purchased it. With less than 50k miles, she said don’t you just love her, we didn’t really go anywhere. She will take great care of you.

I asked her if I can take a picture of her with the car. She loved it. At our parting, I had a citrine crystal in my car and I felt I needed to give it to her. We hugged and we left each other with the greatest feeling. Literally made my day and hers.

Bobby with GiGi

Thank you so much Bobby, for approaching me. So grateful I met you, you have a beautiful soul and spirit!

My pendulum knew something was going to happen that I wouldn’t make it to yoga. And I am so glad this was the reason.

Blog, Metaphysical, New Beginnings, Thoughts, Uncategorized

Different perspective

I understand what I’ve done in my life and being who I am, I see many things I’ve done as not such a big deal. But when you encounter someone whom you have never met and somehow things come up in conversation… Beautiful things begin to unfold in the most peculiar places.

I was at the bank this morning and the topic of me moving to Maine from California came up. The young lady behind the counter remarked about how she wished she coukd just pick up and go somewhere. Its something shes always wanted,to do but has been to afraid to do such things.

I let her know, that its about facing your fears and walking through them. You do not want to look back at your life and say to yourself, man I wish I did that way back,when. Instead, follow your joy. That is who you are meant to be. By listening to your “gut” aka intuition, you can never go wrong. Because at least you tried!

The more often you follow your joy the more you will rcv bigger and better positive things, acts, love. All because you followed your joy. No matter how “scary” it was.

Everything turned out exactly the way it was supposed to. You are in control. Please do not live behind your fear…

I did for most of my life, I am beyond grateful that I can move and walk through my fear. No matter how uncomfortable it is, knowing that its for my greatest and highest good.

Blog, Metaphysical, New Beginnings, Thoughts, Uncategorized

Spring Awakening

February is finally over. Let me just recap this past month for you from my own experiences. Feb 1st (a Friday) I went on an interview that wasn’t my idea, nor my soul’s idea. However, living with your parents for the first time in decades, their idealisms began to seep into my subconscious; making me believe that I needed another job and that I should go get one.

Over the weekend I came to the realization that it wasn’t mine. The interview, the idea was not mine. Monday or Tuesday I replied to their offer of acceptance and turned them down. The next morning I wake up with a locked back.

The following week, almost 99% healed, I slip on the ice and end up with whiplash for the next week. As a matter of fact, it was Valentines Day. I slowly heal from that and by the following week I am 100% better just to begin having car issues.

Literally a week to that day happened to be Friday the 1st, March. My car died. Oh my what a month.

February was a month of deep inner reflection. I honestly feel that it was for releasing my past and everything that no longer serves me now. Thoughts, beliefs, anything that had low vibrating energies were released, forcefully. lol.

Gratitude for becoming aware of all of these things allowed me to step into the light and see things, again, in a new light. In a more loving and compassionate way, with gentleness and ease.

Today marks a mercury retrograde. March 2nd, I declared that this retrograde is going to come and go with ease and grace. I am going to be shining inside and out, radiating positivity and nothing can get me down.

I just created a vision board last night. When I create vision boards, my intentions are to create, what inspires me and subconsciously everything that ends up on my boards is everything I need to hear, see or understand. This particular vision board is all about awakenings and standing in the light, being authentically me. Starting fresh, renewed, Spring awakening!

vision board
Spring Awakening 2019

And spring is literally around the corner. Having my vehicle die when it did, made me realize that I had been holding onto California for what it represented. I had been living in California on and off for my entire life. This most recent venture was for 7 years. The only other ID I’ve had was NH when I got my drivers license. I’ve lived in many states and only ID’d myself in 2. That changed in January when I became an official Maine state resident. And I never changed over my vehicle info, I was going to wait till the tags ran out but my car died before that happened.

me and my car
Just outside of Chaco Canyon New Mexico. September 2018

So looking back, subconsciously, I didn’t want to want to lose that part of me; the California identity. I already changed my ID and to change my car over it would feel permanent and my identity lost.

It took me till just now to realize this…Thank you for allowing me to spill and let it roll. That’s a huge revelation and gratitude is all I have. Wow…

Now is the time to let go. I release, and so it is. Gone

I am 100% ready for my new life and new energy.

Love, Light and Healing,

Budderflie

Metaphysical

If its not one thing…

This month has been very interesting so far…

Ever feel like it’s just one thing after another? Well, this month has been like that for me and its only been 14 days.

Feb 2 I had an art show at a holistic expo. I met a woman named Rebecca Packard. Wasn’t exactly sure what she did as far as her services go. But this is what she does…

Rebecca Packard- Certified Body Code & Emotion Code Practitioner.

http://www.rebeccapackard.com

Whatever that means, right?!

Well, I wanted to know. She asked me what I wanted cleared, blockages wise. I said abundance. We can all use that, just saying. Anyways, I allow her into my energy field and I started to ask her questions. She was in her zone and started saying words out loud. I felt the need to write them down. By the end it was a rather large list I had written and she looks at me and says, you are released and cleared of that list you wrote down. I look at the list and was like, ok, I’m going with it. She explained how I keep myself safe from allowing those things happen to me again and that was that.

After leaving her, I physically felt different. We described as emotionally drunk. I literally felt like I was buzzed but had nothing to drink. It was really cool to try something different. I have added her to me support team, as I feel it’s important to have people help the healers.

By the end of the weekend I noticed I had a huge bruise on my left calf. Weird because I don’t recall banging my leg against anything. I let it go as it got blacker and bluer.

Sunday night I checked my emails before bed, I don’t suggest doing that by the way, and I read an acceptance letter from an interview I had on that previous friday, Feb 1st. Thats great that I got the job and all but my soul knows what I need. When my work schedule changed to only working 3 shifts a week. I was grateful. I can have more ME time. My hearts desire said we will not be getting another job so we can do just that, self-care and love. That was back in Dec maybe.

The only reason I went on this interview, as it turns out, was because now that I live with my parents, their belief systems do not match mine. Some of the things would say to me crept into my subconscious mind and next thing you know I’m beginning to think, I have no money, OMG! I need a job, all in a frantic. Rebecca helped clear their belief systems out of me.

So when I read the email before bed, I was so nervous about how I was going to respond. So much so that I woke in the morning and my center lower back was locked. Not like sciatica problems, like disc problems. I could barely move.

Lower back issues have to do with security, finances, stability, fear. Needless to say I had to figure out exactly what was going on and I did. My parents old belief systems and my fear of how to respond. Becoming aware of what your body is telling is huge. When things like this happen, that’s what I try to do immediately so I am not in pain.

So after meditating on it and asking my guides for their assistance my back started to feel better, I did also go to the chiropractor because that always helps!

So right in the end of my healing for my back, my pelvic area begins to hurt, which then became excruciating. I was laid up on the floor where I had been stretching my back for the past week and my mom comes in and says, are you ok? Did it get worse? I told her it has nothing to do with my back, but it certainly was affecting it, for sure.

I texted my friends in California, asking for their help. They both responded, saying that basically I havent truly given myself full attention, it was suggested to feed my goddess. Like if you don’t wear lipstick to work, start. I have been wanting a pedi-cure, so i am going to go get one. Self Love, Self Care, Self Pamper. Wine and dine myself, if you will.

Which makes absolute sense. That all happened yesterday. After we figured that out, my pelvic area started to not hurt so bad.

I woke up this morning feeling great. I went outside to go see about moving my car, from all the ice and snow, I don’t even make it to my car and I slip and fell totally on my back. Thank god I had my hood on because I smacked that pretty good.

I feel that my fall this morning had to do with reminding me what I need to do. Feed my goddess. I woke up feeling great, thinking nothing of going through my morning routine. Not thinking about what yesterdays events taught me. So for me to slip on this ice was a solid reminder that the information rcvd yesterday has solidified into a compact state so that I may internalize it.

I look up everything, someone has been through exactly what I have been through so somewhere out there, there is helpful information. This last one about ice and falling…

http://www.meaningfullife.com

In case you have something you want to look up… I always type in

“spiritual meaning of…”

Usually something that resonates with me comes up.

Love, Light and Healing