Blog, Metaphysical, New Beginnings, Thoughts, Uncategorized

Still February?

As we near the end of February, if it wasn’t enough for my back to go out, to acquire severe whiplash and heal from them both immediately as the next is to begin, my car starts to test me. Hahahahaha…

Today I feel great physically,  100%. I decide to run one errand outside of town about 40 mins away when I find myself down memory lane; In Arkansas.

Arkansas- I was driving cross country moving from California to Maine and I find myself in the beautiful mountains of Arkansas, Ouachita National Forest. I wanted to go hiking after meandering through Sedona and Chaco Canyon. As I drive into the forest my 2hrs deep, off the beaten path, my car starts to hiccup. 4 hours later somehow (without navigation because my phone’s decided not to work my entire trip) I make it to my hotel where I can sit and think about what is going on. I met a man who said it was a fuel injector. Long story and $400 later, I make it home.

Needless to say, today has been a long day. Great news however, I made 3 new friends, Chris (told me that it is not fuel injector, but a mass air thingy. Basically he told me I could clean it myself and see how that works before bringing it in), Troy from Napa Auto Parts in Eliot Maine (super friendly and allowed me to work on my car in the parking lot and even called places locally to get me in for an oil change. Because as I was cleaning out the mass air flow sensor I noticed I was due for an oil change.), which leads me to Dan over at Pleasant Street Garage. What a nice solid man. All 3 of these men not only assisted me with my vehicle in way or another, they made me feel better about my situation.

I do understand that everything happens for a reason, I really do, but my oh my. When you depend on your vehicle as much as you do to run awesomely to then not…Your stress level sky rockets, no doubt. It’s very nerve-racking, like, OMG get me off this road and someone fix it for free immediately! HAHAHAHAHA

Slow down and relax…

Park your vehicle, take a hot shower, have a very large glass of wine and binge watch your fav tv show…

AHHHHHHHHHH

Not gonna lie, grateful today is about to end and I can start over tomorrow. Who knows, my car might be fine after its makeover from today!

So grateful for today and learning how to just relax and breathe into it. Which I owe to yoga and floating, breathing that is. Deep breathing.

I got this…whatever the outcome, I got this!

Love, Light and Healing

Budderflie

Blog, Metaphysical, Therapy, Thoughts

Healing

Today is now the 21st day of the month. My last post, I had slipped and fell on the ice. The next day I woke up with a severe case of whiplash. So very painful. I couldn’t go to work and I couldn’t eat. I some how managed to get to the chiropractor and a 30 min massage.

Both allowing the healing process to begin. I relaxed in bed for the next couple of days listening to binaural beats and using my crystal bowl for sound healing on myself. I attempted to take 2 epsom salt baths only to find that there is a leak in the downstairs kitchen from the bath itself, oh boy.

healing
Me trying to assist my healing, listening to cell regeneration binaural beats and icing my swollen neck.

After sitting in pain and meditating and healing for several days, I looked up a floating tanks. Now I can’t take baths at home and my neck needs to be free and released. I found a semi local place, Flote. In North Hampton, NH.

I make an appointment and didn’t realize I would be driving there in a blizzard, which made my neck and shoulders more tense. I make it there in one pc and head on in for my first floating experience.

They offer you a donut shaped foam ring to rest your head on or you can go without. I went for the first half with it under my head and decided to take it out. My head just need to be free. It felt so much better without.

 

What is flotation?

Floating (or floatation therapy) is a practice that involves a small room or pod filled with a foot of water and over a thousand pounds of epsom salt. The high salt content allows you to be completely buoyant as you lay in the water, and creates an experience of deep relaxation.  The environment is quiet and dark, and sensory input is minimized, allowing one to experience a profound level of relaxation. It is a unique practice that provides a long list of mental, physical and spiritual benefits that compound over time with regular sessions.

I highly recommend it to anyone and everyone. I went from feeling like 65% to 85-90% after my session. It is an hour long at Seacoast Flote, not sure how others are working theres. I was able to work the next evening, although not to my full capacity, nonetheless, I did not need to call out, again.

I went one more time after and feel 95%. I have 2 more sessions I will be going to. If you are curious about it, check out this website…Although this is for my area, it will give you an idea. It’s worth trying, especially if you’ve exhausted all other options.

https://www.seacoastflote.com/

Love, Light and Healing,

Budderflie

Metaphysical

If its not one thing…

This month has been very interesting so far…

Ever feel like it’s just one thing after another? Well, this month has been like that for me and its only been 14 days.

Feb 2 I had an art show at a holistic expo. I met a woman named Rebecca Packard. Wasn’t exactly sure what she did as far as her services go. But this is what she does…

Rebecca Packard- Certified Body Code & Emotion Code Practitioner.

http://www.rebeccapackard.com

Whatever that means, right?!

Well, I wanted to know. She asked me what I wanted cleared, blockages wise. I said abundance. We can all use that, just saying. Anyways, I allow her into my energy field and I started to ask her questions. She was in her zone and started saying words out loud. I felt the need to write them down. By the end it was a rather large list I had written and she looks at me and says, you are released and cleared of that list you wrote down. I look at the list and was like, ok, I’m going with it. She explained how I keep myself safe from allowing those things happen to me again and that was that.

After leaving her, I physically felt different. We described as emotionally drunk. I literally felt like I was buzzed but had nothing to drink. It was really cool to try something different. I have added her to me support team, as I feel it’s important to have people help the healers.

By the end of the weekend I noticed I had a huge bruise on my left calf. Weird because I don’t recall banging my leg against anything. I let it go as it got blacker and bluer.

Sunday night I checked my emails before bed, I don’t suggest doing that by the way, and I read an acceptance letter from an interview I had on that previous friday, Feb 1st. Thats great that I got the job and all but my soul knows what I need. When my work schedule changed to only working 3 shifts a week. I was grateful. I can have more ME time. My hearts desire said we will not be getting another job so we can do just that, self-care and love. That was back in Dec maybe.

The only reason I went on this interview, as it turns out, was because now that I live with my parents, their belief systems do not match mine. Some of the things would say to me crept into my subconscious mind and next thing you know I’m beginning to think, I have no money, OMG! I need a job, all in a frantic. Rebecca helped clear their belief systems out of me.

So when I read the email before bed, I was so nervous about how I was going to respond. So much so that I woke in the morning and my center lower back was locked. Not like sciatica problems, like disc problems. I could barely move.

Lower back issues have to do with security, finances, stability, fear. Needless to say I had to figure out exactly what was going on and I did. My parents old belief systems and my fear of how to respond. Becoming aware of what your body is telling is huge. When things like this happen, that’s what I try to do immediately so I am not in pain.

So after meditating on it and asking my guides for their assistance my back started to feel better, I did also go to the chiropractor because that always helps!

So right in the end of my healing for my back, my pelvic area begins to hurt, which then became excruciating. I was laid up on the floor where I had been stretching my back for the past week and my mom comes in and says, are you ok? Did it get worse? I told her it has nothing to do with my back, but it certainly was affecting it, for sure.

I texted my friends in California, asking for their help. They both responded, saying that basically I havent truly given myself full attention, it was suggested to feed my goddess. Like if you don’t wear lipstick to work, start. I have been wanting a pedi-cure, so i am going to go get one. Self Love, Self Care, Self Pamper. Wine and dine myself, if you will.

Which makes absolute sense. That all happened yesterday. After we figured that out, my pelvic area started to not hurt so bad.

I woke up this morning feeling great. I went outside to go see about moving my car, from all the ice and snow, I don’t even make it to my car and I slip and fell totally on my back. Thank god I had my hood on because I smacked that pretty good.

I feel that my fall this morning had to do with reminding me what I need to do. Feed my goddess. I woke up feeling great, thinking nothing of going through my morning routine. Not thinking about what yesterdays events taught me. So for me to slip on this ice was a solid reminder that the information rcvd yesterday has solidified into a compact state so that I may internalize it.

I look up everything, someone has been through exactly what I have been through so somewhere out there, there is helpful information. This last one about ice and falling…

http://www.meaningfullife.com

In case you have something you want to look up… I always type in

“spiritual meaning of…”

Usually something that resonates with me comes up.

Love, Light and Healing

 

Metaphysical, New Beginnings

New Town New Beginnings

I just kind of got settled in my old home town of York Maine. I flew into Boston on Saturday and I will be here till September.

I have settling in and in doing so I wanted to look around for like minded people. So I went on Meetup.com where I had found most of my like minded friends in California. I found a local meetup in Portsmouth, NH for a sound and reiki healing meditation. I had no expectations walking into it.

There ended up being 3 reiki masters including myself, we went around the room to about 15 or so people. We each did reiki on someone, I happen to work on 4 women. It was a mix of men and women.

It was great, I enjoyed helping these women. At the close of the meetup, I went to each of the women that I performed reiki on and told them what I felt and saw. One woman cried as she hugged me in gratitude. I was able to meet each of their spirit guides and share them with the ladies, individually of course.

My spiritual coach/ friend/ teacher/ guide and I did the ceremony last Wednesday before I left California to start on my new journey, she looked at me and said you are about to start your journey over there as a teacher. You are no longer a student. And she is right, everything that I am doing or saying is affecting the ones close to me. For the greatest and highest good.

I am truly blessed to be on this new journey and very excited to meet new people. This is no longer a chapter in a book, this is definitely a sequel.

Love, Light and Healing

Blog, Metaphysical, New Beginnings, Thoughts, Uncategorized

Cactus Ceremony

After some time of not having internet access, I am back. This past Wednesday I participated in a Cactus Ceremony.

The intention for Cactus Ceremony is to open your heart space and allow healing. You are asked to come with your personal intentions on what you would like to heal.

For me, my intention was to heal everything that hasn’t been cleared (energetically) from my past up unto this point. So that I may move forward free and clear, open and ready to receive.

In my life at this time, I was preparing to leave Central California and go back East to see my mom and my step dad (Whom I’ve only started talking to in the past year, after 2 years of not speaking). I have healed all of my childhood wounds that came forward, however there are a several things that have been brought to my attention and in my recent past that needed healing. My intention was to clear that. And I did.

It was a 4 part ceremony. We meditated and spoke of our personal lives and pulled oracle and tarot cards. Every card pulled was on point, more of a confirmation than anything.

 

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Our Alter

 

As it turns out this entire ceremony was based on us trusting, valuing, having confidence, and understanding ourselves. Every card pulled had the word trust in it. We had set an alter and I had placed my shungite Merkabah on the alter and on top of it I placed a little stone with the word trust on it. Not knowing that the entire ceremony would be based on that word alone. Shungite is a beautiful crystal that assists in purification, most importantly for me, emotional balance. I was leaving a place I had come to know and appreciate with amazing people and I was heading to a place where I was not accepted as I child. I am a woman now and I really don’t have many fears, if at all. But nonetheless I was about to embark on a journey of the unknown. Unknowing of the outcome, so this particular crystal found me and I use it daily.

Part of the trusting, is listening to yourself. When something doesn’t sit right with you, why? what is the feeling? The sooner I can recognize the sooner I can adjust it and work on it and it will dissipate. Awareness is the key factor. If you are not aware then there is no way you can trust yourself. Because trusting yourself is listening to yourself. It really is a beautiful thing.

The last segment of the ceremony is, how can I assist the Cactus medicine in it’s healing. I thought about it for a minute and then it just came out, I am going to create a sacred space for myself wherever I go.

If you are in spiritual awareness you KNOW that you are sacred.

Well, after I said that I started thinking that I can use physical items to help me create these sacred spaces. Then, as if lightening struck, I said no I AM SACRED.

I, at that exact moment, UNDERSTOOD that I am sacred. I can say I know forever but do you really understand? I most certainly do. I now totally understand that I am sacred and I am sacred space.

When we were closing ceremony, my friend was taking us through the closing prayer and the minute she said letting go the candle burnt out. It truly was magical. So many synchronistic things were happening all night and the messages were all so loud and clear. It was beautiful.

After we closed ceremony my friend decided she was going to take a shot. I have not had a drink in 10 years. I quit drinking because my best friend said I had a problem and if I didn’t stop I would die. Then she told me she didn’t think I could do it. So I had to prove her wrong. So I stopped and did the whole AA thing.

I drank because I was running away from my problems. I couldn’t handle them without being drunk. I have gone through so much healing that I no longer have anything that I run from.

So when my friend decided to have a drink, I thought about it. I couldn’t even finish my thought before my spirit guides said it’s ok, you can have a drink. It’s about trust, right? I am so used to being put into a category of Alcoholics that society will judge me if I take a drink. That is my human side if thinking, logical, practical, old ideas and beliefs. I have learned throughout the past couple of years that I does not matter what anyone thinks of you and you just do you. Do what makes you happy and makes your heart sing.

So now the crossroads have become, do I not take a drink because society says I can’t? Or do I take a drink because I trust that I am a completely new within myself?

I am doing me and I listen to myself today! I poured 1/2 a shot of Jameson Whiskey. Every time my friend took a shot I would take a sip of my shot. It was so smooth and so nice. I thoroughly enjoyed myself. After all we were celebrating ourselves and everything that is coming. The new Us. I was truly liberating.

I was able to take a drink because I am not running from emotions or trying to hide and not confront emotions. I can have just one drink if I so choose. I am not the scared little girl anymore, I have grown into a beautiful, soulful woman. I love my life.